Programmer Jokes

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Since light travels faster than sound...

isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

Female Web Designer needs &nbsp;

I once dated a female web designer. But she eventually dumped me. She said she needed some "&nbsp;,"...

sorry nerds

Look, here's the thing - I really don't care that ten years from now you will be controlling 20% of the world's economy because of some piece of computer code you invented, for now you have absolutely no business wearing a cape to school.

sorry nerds - elephantitis of the mind

Jokes

So this guy is walking down a dark alley and he hears a woman from the shadows whisper "I'll do anything you want for 20 dollars."

So he ducks into that corner and starts ___ing her and this cop comes along and shines a flashlight on them. The man says "OFFICER, DO YOU MIND?! I'M TRYING TO ___ MY WIFE!"

The officer says quickly "Sorry sir. I didn't know it was your wife."

"Me neither -- until you turned that light on."

Ben Affleck

Ben Affleck goes to the doctor and tells him Every time i look into the mirror i have this problem. I get sexually arroused,

The doctor says, Oh, well, I know what's causing that; you're a big p|_|ssy.

Prindle Record Reviews (again) - Faith No More

I saw the saddest thing today - dripping down the sidewalk was a freshly spilled stew consisting of kernels of corn, lima beans, and tomatoes. Call me a softy, but if there's one thing I can't stand to see, it's SUFFERING SUCCOTASH!!!

Prindle Record Reviews - Faith No More

My second grade teacher thought I had a mental disorder because I shook up and down in my seat all the time. Turns out I just had to pee!

Backwards Bush

And Thus Was Born the Most Revered Phrase In Tech Support

Comics and Editorial Cartoons: Non Sequitur on Yahoo! News

Betty's Funhouse

Betty takes those classic email jokes that everyone loves in their inbox and publishes them straight to this blog. ...a place that people can come to for a smile and a few laughs. Enjoy!!

Global Stupidity

Men do have trouble hearing women, scientists find

Now it all starts to make sense. Honey, are you listening?! Yahoo! News

Bad Spellers of the World, Untie!

Carrying signs reading I'm thru with through, Spelling shuud be lojical, and Spell different difrent, the protesters -- who first protested two years ago, but skipped last year -- drew chuckles from [spelling] bee contestants.

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