Monkey & Lizard

Here is a funny one found on a random blog. Warning to Kids: Don't do drugs! It leads to talking animals.

A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up, and says to the monkey, Hey, what're you doing?

The monkey replies, Smokin' a joint, come up and have some.

So the lizard climbs up the tree, sits next to the monkey, and they smoke a few joints. After a while the lizard says his mouth is "dry" and he's going to the river to get a drink. The lizard climbs down the tree and staggers over to the river to get a drink of water, but he is so stoned, he leans over too far and falls into the river.

A crocodile sees this, swims over to the lizard and helps him back to the side. Then the crocidile asks the lizard, What's the matter with you? The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting up in a tree with a monkey smoking pot, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink. The crocodile says he has to check this out, and wanders off into the jungle.

He finds the tree where the monkey is sitting finishing up a joint. The crocodile yells up to the monkey Hey!

The monkey looks down and shouts in surprise, Dude! How much water did you drink?!