Do You Have A Strange Mind?

Thanks to Michelle S. for sending me this one. I've seen it before, but not in this much detail.

Interesting

Do you have a strange mind?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but The wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.

The text seems to suggest that it takes a special mind to read the above, but I think it is more universal. In other words, any idiot can do it. Anyhow, it's funny either way.

Fun of Having Boys

Thanks to Chris J. and his wife for submitting this one. I post it here for those of you who can appreciate the fun of having a boy. This is also for those of you who wonder why mothers of boys LOVE their grand-daughters. Isn't that right, mom?

Five Stages of a Female's Life

Here is another one submitted by Stacy N. via email. Thanks again Stacy! These are the Five Stages of a Woman's Life.

Stage #1: To Grow Up

Stage #2: To Fill Out

Stage #3: To Slim Down

Stage #4: To Hold It In

And finally...

Stage #5: To Hell With It

Mister P.P. Head

Warning: the attached image is a slightly graphic cartoon, but sometimes that is the ...er, lengths to which one must go for a laugh. This one was submitted by Stacy N., so thanks to Stacy!

A German Lady, A Japanese Lady, & A Hillbilly Lady

Three women; one German, one Japanese and one a hillbilly; were sitting naked in a sauna. Suddenly there was a beeping sound.

The German lady pressed her forearm and the beeping stopped. The others looked at her questioningly. Oh. That was my pager, she said, I have a microchip under the skin of my arm.

A few minutes later, a phone rings. The Japanese lady lifted her palm to her ear and talked quietly. When she finished she explained, That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand.

The hillbilly lady felt decidedly low tech. Not to be out done, she decided she had to do something just as impressive. She stepped out of the sauna and went to the bathroom.

She returned with a piece of toilet paper hanging from her behind. The others raised their eyebrows and stared at her.

The hillbilly lady finally said, Well, willya lookit that, I'm getting a fax!

Jokes4All.net - Random Jokes

Army Rangers & Alligator Shoes

An Army Ranger was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana and he wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Ranger shouted, maybe I'll just go out and get my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!

The vendor said, By all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Marines who were in here earlier saying the same thing.

So the Ranger headed into the bayou that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing waist deep in the water. He thought, those must be the two Marines the guy in town was talking about. Just then, the Ranger saw a tremendously long aligator swimming rapidly underwater towards one of the Marines.

Just as the aligator was about to attack, the Marine grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Marines dragged it on shore and flipped it on its back. Laying nearby were several more of the creatures.

One of the Marines then exclaimed, Damn, this one doesn't have any shoes either!

Forward RE: Friendship

Thanks to Bryan F. for this one.

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card- just the stone cold truth of friendship.

• When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
• When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
• When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.
• When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
• When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
• When you are confused -- I will use little words.
• When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
• When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

You should proceed to send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over !!

Windows is Not a Virus - Jokes4all.net

No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:

• They replicate quickly. ... Okay, Windows does that.
• Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so. ... Okay, Windows does that.
• Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk. ... Okay, Windows does that too.
• Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. ... Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
• Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. ... Yup, Windows does that, too.
• Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.

So Windows is not a virus. ... It's a bug.